Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for April, 2009

Bitterness

Bitterness brings out the worst in people. All the thoughts that you keep hidden start surfacing as you sound off on everything that irks you: job hunting, friends, relationships, family, Starbucks getting your drink order wrong, you name it. Hell, thoughts that you didn’t even know you had start to surface too.

I know that unemployment is all that I talk about but hey, it’s all I know right now. Although I’ve touched on the positive sides, I’m gonna be frank and let you in on what I’ve really been feeling. I’ve been venting non-stop to the oh-so-patient boyfriend, but I think it’s time I relieve him of all this non-stop bitching and complaining.

There are levels to bitterness. I’m at level four but I’m standing at the doorsteps of level five.

The five levels of bitterness.

Deluded bitterness: You’re still in the early stages a.k.a. you’re still in denial. You are optimistic, although rejection after rejection has started to put a damper on your day. Regardless, you still keep on fighting with a smile. You’ll get through this. It can’t get any worse right? 

Fighting bitterness: Reality has slowly started to sink in. Your optimism has dwindled down to almost nothing. But no, you can’t give up now! You put all your effort into the one little ounce of hope you have left. Maybe if you nuture it, you tell yourself, it’ll grow into something great. Right? RIGHT?

Hopeless bitterness: Reality has completely sunk in. You finally admit that this is what everyone’s been warning you about. That is, everyone who’s employed. Why are they telling me this? They aren’t even going through this. You start to become anti-social and retreat to the dark corner of your room. Your only communication with the world is through the safety of your computer. After all, it’s easier to tell your friends about your failures via Internet than it is when they’re staring at you with pity.

Jealous bitterness: You start to evaluate everyone around you. How come they have it so easy? How come they knew all the right people? How come their lazy ass found a job before you? Oh yeah, it’s because their awesome boyfriend did all the work for them. You start to wonder what you’re doing wrong. How come your perseverance and diligence in job hunting hasn’t paid off yet? How did your friend manage to land an interview when he doesn’t even wake up until 5 p.m.?

Bitter for no reason: You start to hate on everyone and everything for no particular reason. Essentially, all you’re doing is looking for the negative in every way that you can. You hate the worker at Starbucks for messing up your drink order. You hate the bank teller who asked you if you wanted to open a savings account. Doesn’t she know that I’m unemployed?! You can’t even look at another human being without a  negative thought running through your head: “What the hell is she wearing? She looks like a slut” “He thinks he’s buff but he still has an ugly face” “Hm, fat man with hot arm candy: gold digger!” “Cute looking kid. She doesn’t know how good she has it right now”

If you are bitter, what level are you?

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

Hopeful Changes

My last thread of hope of finding a job is being bashed down by the reality that I just can’t wait around anymore. I’m closing in on five months and the thought of waiting another five makes me sick to my stomach.

gra_17a1

Unemployed people, let’s face it, we’re not being productive if we’re just sitting idly scouring the Internet for jobs over and over again (although I still do this). Bitching and moaning clearly doesn’t work either.

Let’s face it: I can’t compete with candidates who are applying for jobs that I can barely do and they are over-qualified to do. I can’t compete with candidates who are veterans of the workforce while I haven’t held a job for longer than a year. I can’t compete even compete with college students because some companies won’t take you unless you are enrolled in a university.

Endless suggestions of applying to graduate school, tutoring, getting a part-time job, doing volunteer, have all been pushed aside with the hope that I would soon find a full-time job that would force me to quit something before I even started. Turns out, there is no full-time job in sight, let alone a part-time one.

So I finally gave in. Granted, five months is a long time to be stubborn but hey, better late than never right?

Although it’s not anything new, the idea of being proactive and active has finally taken hold. I’m not letting the excuse of “but what if I get a job next week?!” stop me from pursuing other things, even if I’m not sure why I’m even pursuing them. Let’s face it. It’s a shitty economy and in less than two months, I will no longer be considered a recent graduate because the real recent graduates will take my place and I will fall under the category of “unemployed college graduate who can’t find a damn job” Nice eh?

So in a bizarre turn of events, I have finally given in to tutoring. My aunt has been my lifesaver and with my cousins in the 6th and 8th grade, her resources for parents-seeking-writing-tutors are utterly endless. In less than three days, I was offered two private tutoring jobs and one opportunity to teach a writing course for the summer. Who knows what the next few months could bring? I have also decided to study for the GRE.  For those who know me, tutoring was the last thing I ever thought I would (or could) do and graduate school was never an option because I was shooting for business school instead. I’m not even sure if I’ll even end up going through with graduate school but it’s definitely not a bad option to have. And who knows, maybe a full-time job will come my way; and if it doesn’t, then it won’t be any different from the last five months. So with all that, on top of the three classes I’ve been taking,  for someone who’s unemployed, I’ve been surprisingly busy. And that’s the way I like it.

“Don’t let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use.” — Earl Nightingale

Read Full Post »

Dear  Kristen Dalton:

Congratulations on being crowned the new Miss USA! You are definitely a hottie. Before the contest took place, I told my boyfriend that you would win because, clearly, you’re the hottest (come on, we all know Miss USA pageants are all based on hotness)

You made me proud. You made North Carolina proud. But maybe you should have been more controversial like Miss California. Then you would be all over the news. You know, for a being runner-up, Carrie Prejean sure has gotten a lot more news coverage than you. If I didn’t know any better, I would have thought that she won.

Sincerely,

Diana

Everyone’s been talking about it and if you haven’t heard the news, just open your web browser and you’ll see dozens of articles on this topic.

The controversial moment

The controversial moment

For those who need a quick update:

Taking to his blog afterwards, Hilton was furious with Prejean’s answer, calling it “the worst answer in pageant history” He wasn’t upset that she disagreed with gay marriage, he was upset that her answer alienated all gays and lesbians and supporters and friends of gay rights. The purpose of Miss USA is to reunite, he said, it wasn’t to decide and her answer was divisive

Prejean’s defense? If asked the same question, she’d give the same answer. She noted that Hilton asked for her opinion and she gave her opinion.

“I did not want to offend anybody, but I think with that question specifically, it’s not about being politically correct, for me it was being biblically correct”

Both have excellent points.

Now here’s my question:

What if Prejean had said that she was in support of gay marriage? Would Hilton still be furious that her answer alienated all those who opposed gay marriage or would he be thrilled because he agreed with her? Because technically, if she was in support of gay marriage, she wouldn’t be uniting everyone, she’d be alienating all those who opposed gay marriage.

I’m just saying.

Read Full Post »

The five people you meet in a coffee shop:

1. The productive worker: Laptop? Check. Tall black coffee? Check. Stacks of papers and books? Check. This is the single person who takes up 3 seats. One for himself, one for his backpack and one for all his other crap. They are especially annoying when there isn’t a seat left in the house except for the two that he’s using for his non-human crap. However, with his desktop showing some complicated spreadsheet, you feel bad if you interrupt him because clearly, the man is working hard. Instead, you grumble to yourself and stand in the middle of the store looking like a loner until someone leaves their seat. It could be in a matter of seconds, or worse, it could be in a matter of 25 minutes.

2. The fake-productive worker: Laptop? Check. Tall black coffee? Check. Stacks of papers and book? Check. Productivity level? Non-existent. While all the right materials are present, the lack of concentration is evident: Facebook  or Twitter on the computer screen. Now, I’ve definitely been a fake-productive worker (2 hours web searching, 45 minutes of actual work) but I only take up minimal space. I have no problem with you being one of these workers, just as long as you don’t take up 3 seats all for you and the stacks of books that you obviously have not touched since you put them down. Oh yeah, and if you’re going to watch some movie or Youtube video, please be courteous of others and bring headphones. No one needs to hear some skater get owned by the concrete.

3. The bored housewives: Kids in school and no errands to run? Meet up with other housewives at your local coffee shop to kill some time! Although I don’t see them as often anymore, I have a love/hate relationship with these women. They come, in flocks, and take up a whole section of the coffee shop. They laugh, talk and gossip, all at volume level 10. Even if I’m sitting on the opposite side of the shop, headphones in and music blasting, I can still hear them chatting away. Their kids, husbands, neighbors, affairs, you name it; these women will gossip about everything and anything. Maybe these meetings are a “Let’s see who’s family is doing better” competition but eavesdropping on them feels like I’m listening in on a reality show.

4. The coffee date with “friends”: This is why coffee shops were invented: give people a place to hang out that doesn’t require more than 45 minutes. Ever have a run-in with an old friend? When hearing the phrase “We should catch up!” you cringe. Why? Because you don’t want to catch up but you’re too nice to say no. So what do you tell them? You say, “Why don’t we get coffee sometime?” Why? Because coffee shops are a quick and painless way to order a drink, gulp it down, and mutter some excuse that you gotta get going. Because coffee shops allow you to avoid the awkward lunch/dinner date where you might get dragged to “hang out” afterwards. I love watching these “friends” catch up because they are in and out of the store within 30 minutes. It’s such a great let’s-get-this-over-with hangout spot that keeps coffee shop business alive.

5. The awkward first/blind dater: These are the best. It starts off with one. He/she sits nervously, hands gripped around their coffee cup, sitting up straight every time a person walks through the front door. He or she will pat down their outfit, making sure there isn’t a smudge of makeup (girls) or their hair is in place (guys). As soon as their date walks in, they’ll break out a nervous smile. They’ll stand up awkwardly to greet them (sometimes with an awkward hug) and they’ll sit and start to chat. They’ll make small talk about the weather, how they got there (what the hell right?), traffic, you name it—anything to avoid the awkwardness that is clearly present. Sometime it goes well, sometime it ends in a quick getaway. Either way, these are fun to watch and eavesdrop on (yes, I do this a lot).

Read Full Post »

Rejected. Unemployed.

These two words are always number 1 & 2 in searches when they come to my blog.

I’m either 1) writing too way much about these two topics or 2) I’m clearly not the only one feeling these two words

Look at that man/woman in the white coat walking away from the line in the picture above. Does this mean he/she got a job? Maybe it’s because his/her white coat stood out in the thousands of black coat-wearing people.

I followed up on a job submission today (actually I followed up on 20) and I received the following email:

Thank you for your second email. With over a hundred applications, it is difficult to go thru everyone of them. Therefore, I just reviewed your resume. Your qualifications are more that what we need. This is a very simple research position. Additionally, your commuting from [the city I live in], our pay rate may not make the trip worthwhile.
Thank you for your interest.
*** ****

Rejected for being too overqualified and living too far away. At least I got her to take a look at my resume after I emailed her so she’d have to look at it so figure out who the hell I am. At least I don’t have to work for someone who spells “through” as “thru”, writes “every one” as “everyone” and types “that” instead of “than” Good gosh there are a lot of typos.

But something she said rang true:  With over a hundred application, how was she suppose to sift through them and find mine? What’s the point of making a pretty looking resume if my email address will blend in with everyone else’s email address? Yes, I could physically walk in and hand in my resume (which works for some places) but seriously, how does a person sift through that much info?

A friend of mine used to work for a booking agency proved this concept to be true. She told me, one time, she posted an ad looking for a certain type of model and within an hour she had over 50 submissions. I’m assuming by the next hour, it doubled. Overwhelmed, she didn’t know how to even begin sorting through them. So she came up with a bizarre system: Toss out ugly ones, toss out ones with one typo, toss out ones that just look weird. Even doing that, she still had hundreds of submissions left over and it all became random at some point.


So how do you make yourself stand out? No really, I’m asking.

I’ve looked at every possible resumed-related article on how to beef it up, make it stand out amongst the rest (unless everyone else rest those too, then I’m back to square one). I’ve looked at every possible career-related article on how to network, get your name on there, etc. I’ve looked at every cover letter-related article on how to write effective cover letters. Tailored resume? Check. Tailored cover letter? Check. Research on companies? Check. No replies or replies with rejections? Check and check.

I know there’s something I’m missing. What is it?!

I wish I had been born a Trump and have my dad let me run one of his multi-million dollar companies.

Read Full Post »

iRobot for your garden

Calling all Roomba Vacuum lovers and lazy gardeners: Say hello to your new best friend!

MIT students have created a robot that will do your gardening so you don’t have to.

The small, $3,000 robots, which move through the garden on a base similar to a Roomba vacuum, are networked to the plants. When the plants indicate they need water, the robots can sprinkle them from a water pump. When the plants have a ripe tomato, the machines use their arms to pluck the fruit.¹

Sweet deal huh? Is it just me or are humans getting lazier and lazier? Granted, we are getting smarter, developing technology from the washing machine to the microwave to cell phones to computers.

Are we becoming too co-dependent on technology?

Remember Thomas Guide Maps? Do they still publish those? Looking up directions was tedious but at least we were more aware of our surroundings since we had to be on the lookout. Nowadays, we can look up directions on Google Maps in under 30 seconds or even better, we can just type it into our GPS and not even pay attention to the street names anymore. I pride myself on having impeccable direction skills. People used to call me for directions. Now I’ve become so dependent on my GPS that I get lost if I try not to use it (so sad)

Hey, I’m just saying. Let’s not have a real-life version of the movie iRobot

Read Full Post »

This past week, State Rep. Betty Brown proved to us that some people still live in the 1960s

Texas lawmaker: Asians should change their names to make them ‘easier for Americans to deal with.’

On Tuesday, State Rep. Betty Brown (R) caused a firestorm during House testimony on voter identification legislation when she said that Asian-Americans should change their names because they’re too hard to pronounce:

Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese — I understand it’s a rather difficult language — do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?” Brown said.

Brown later told [Organization of Chinese Americans representative Ramey] Ko: “Can’t you see that this is something that would make it a lot easier for you and the people who are poll workers if you could adopt a name just for identification purposes that’s easier for Americans to deal with?”

Yesterday, Brown continued to resist calls to apologize. Her spokesman said that Democrats “want this to just be about race.” ¹

I understand her argument. Not all of us were lucky enough to be born with such an easy name like Betty Brown.

Not to be outdone, Hypthen Magazine responded with a brilliant letter (thanks for the link Liz):

A Letter to Betty Brown

Dear Representative Betty Brown, I know you’ve gotten a lot of flak over your suggestion that Asian Americans change their names to something “easier for Americans to deal with” in order to exercise their right to vote. You know what? I agree. I mean, shoot, names like Ko, Vu, Chang, Patel, Kim, Gupta, and Park are just hard to learn. And why should you spend a second of your life trying to learn something new? You’re a busy woman, working hard at legislating and all. People should totally change for you!

In fact, there are a whole lot of words that come from difficult languages that we should change. These words are really hard too! Well, I’m here to help. I’ve taken the liberty of collecting a few of them and suggesting new names for them so that it will be easier for all of us:

Parmesan. Mozzarella. Gouda. Brie. Why do cheeses have such funny names? Henceforth, let us just call these all “American Cheese.”

Heineken, Corona, Guinness. A gal just wants to have a nice drink after a hard day’s work, but then you’re faced with all these difficult-sounding choices at the bar. What to do? If they’re sold in America, they should have American names. Henceforth, let us just call these “American Beer.”

Tortilla. That’s a word with a lot of L’s in it. And together they make a Y sound. So tricky! Henceforth, let us call them “American Round Flat Tasty Things.”

And who wants to have pie à la mode? Why do people call it something so fancy sounding? Really, isn’t it just “with American ice cream?”

Chevrolet doesn’t sound very American either. Let’s just call them all Fords.
You know what else is hard? The names on crayons. Sienna. Magenta. Turquoise. Why do these names need to be so strange and exotic? Let’s just call them all Brown. Cause, you know, everything should revolve around you!²

Thanks Hyphen Magazine, you made us proud.

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »